Poor by Profession

As everyone has been talking about the sequester the last couple weeks I hear a lot of blame being thrown around.

Now, I'm not here to say that I know who to blame, I'm sure there is a lot to go around (especially in Washington).  But I would like to share my point of view when I hear the blame being put on everyone who's "draining" the government by using government assistance.

It seems to me that everyone likes to lay as much blame as possible at the feet of the lazy poor.  Those who are able to work, but don't.  Those who are working just barely and then taking as much government assistance as they can.

Let me try to share my story so maybe someone will see just how offensive this is.  Especially in light of the CEO's and high ranking company officials, especially at banks, who get millions in "bonuses" at the same time as their companies are taking massive government bailouts.

We are teachers.  

We chose this profession because we felt called to it.  We knew going in that it would NEVER make us rich.  We don't do it for the money.  And that right there seems to be the key to teachers.  If we did it for the money everyone would say we were awful and evil.  Yet, many many teachers consider changing professions and many of them work second jobs in the summer or weekends just.to.make.ends.meet.  I don't know any doctors or lawyers or any other highly trained professionals who have to take extra jobs just to get by while working in their main profession.  And would you like teachers to teach the next generation who are only there for the money and don't really care about the students?  (not to mention that we are required by law to have continuing education degrees on our own dime to even keep our job - I can't think of any other industry that requires that without paying for it, or at least subsidizing it)

I saw a political cartoon the other day that so perfectly makes my point.  Reporters and politicians storming into a classroom asking a teacher what she was doing wrong when on the front of every desk in the room were the situations of her students.  Teenage parent, abused child, had no breakfast, bullied, etc.  And we wonder why teachers have a hard time teaching students who are not fully present in the classroom?  We do it because we truly care about these students and we want them to succeed not just academically, but as a whole person.  It is a calling and no amount of money can make it different.  But it would be nice to have enough to live on.

Right now, I am a stay at home mother.  I have four small children, only one of whom is just this year school age.  Even with one child in daycare full time it would be half of a teacher's salary.  When we only had one child we could get by on only my husband's salary.  So I stayed home.  When we had two children it became a stretch.  Having four means that if I were to work full time I would be spending more on child care than I would take home every month.  How does that work in any economy?

So, I stay home for now, and we tighten our belts as much as we can.  It's funny because every time I see one of those articles about "10 Quick Ways to Save Each Month" I click because I wonder if there's something I'm missing.  But every single thing on those lists we already do.  We don't drink coffee, and maybe once a month get a "fancy" drink from a coffee stand.  We have one cell phone (and not a smart one) between the two of us.  We don't have cable, we have Netflix that costs us $8.50 a month and the kids watch it for an hour a day so I can get a shower.  We don't eat out.  Last week we went out for ice cream.  That's the extent of what we can afford.  We don't have date nights or go to movies because we can't afford that, let alone a babysitter (yes, Mom, we totally appreciate you watching the boys so we can have a break!)

We live out in a "poor" area in a small house because our parents' paid the down payment for us.  Now our mortgage is the same as the rent was on our 2 bedroom apartment.  If they hadn't done it we'd still have 4 kids in a teeny tiny 2 bedroom apartment.  But our house is enough and I'm not complaining about it.

All of these things are choices we have made. 

However, every time I hear someone talking about the way people on government assistance are lazy it makes my blood boil.

When is it enough?  When am I being frugal enough to qualify for government assistance?  If I let you come over and scrutinize my finances with a fine tooth comb would you still think there were things I wasn't doing well enough?  Where is the line that says even if you are poor you still deserve the dignity of being treated as a real human being instead of a leech on society?

Would you say that we are unworthy because we spend more on food than you deem necessary?  Never mind that we need to eat gluten free, which is very expensive.  Never mind that I don't buy highly processed chemical filled sugary substitutes for food that actually cost less than real whole food.  Never mind that I basically cook my family a healthy meal from scratch every night.  And yes, we do eat rice and beans too.

What about the body products that I use?  Are those too expensive because I refuse to put petroleum based chemicals that have proven to cause cancer in lab animals on my children?  Because I probably still spend less in a month than most people do on personal care products.

Where is the line?

Is it okay for you to make me feel like a worthless stupid mother because I get WIC checks?  To threaten me when I have a different opinion on how to care for my children?  Is it okay for you to treat me like I couldn't possibly know anything just because my children get some state medical insurance?  Does the fact that I am poor mean my college education was a waste and I couldn't possibly have learned anything since I am not a contributing member of society (and here contributing only seems to mean making money)?

I have faced each of these scenarios multiple times.  I am by nature, not a confrontational person so usually I say as little as necessary to get my point across (because I will NOT back down when it comes to my children) and walk away.  But just because I don't react doesn't mean it doesn't still hurt.

I am hurt.

I am hurt every time someone makes a blanket statement about how anyone on welfare is lazy.  How we are "gaming" the system by taking every advantage we possibly can - implying that it is at their expense.  Last time I checked we all benefit from some form of government services.

I am hurt when it is implied that you MUST take a second job before you dare take any form of assistance, never mind the hurt that it would cause to your family, effectively making you a one parent household at all times.  How does this improve the stability of the family and the future of our country?

We are poor by profession.  

There is very little we can do to change this (no merit based raises for teachers) except to simply change our profession.  Maybe some would say that's what you should do, but when is the almighty dollar the end goal of life?  Our life as we live it is not bad.  We have food, shelter, friends, and family.  We don't need much assistance to get by and have actually turned down some that we qualify for.  We love teaching and don't want to change professions and lose the chance to help our students.

Is it too much to ask you to respect our choices and refrain from being mean and judgmental without knowing the whole story?

Thankful

So, I didn't intend for that last post to post...  I spent a good hour the other night writing out all the crazy things that have happened (there was a part 2) and then realized that I was just annoyed all over again.  Instead I intended to write all the reasons I was thankful for those problems.  Only thing is I forgot to un-schedule that post!

So if you will let me start over... and add the ones from the second post...

I'm thankful that we are (mostly) able to afford insurance for me.  I know many people are not.  I'm thankful that we are in good enough health that that insurance almost doesn't seem necessary.  I will be thankful for it when it is necessary.

I'm thankful that I have the opportunity to buy cleaner(chemical wise) things for my children to eat out of.  I'm thankful that I have money to spend on some little extra toys because I know they will love them.

I'm thankful that I will now have the opportunity to make ice cream for us with better ingredients.  My waistline probably won't thank me!

I'm thankful I have a camera to document life around me.  I love it (obviously) and I'm thankful I can sometimes even use it to make some money.

I'm thankful for friends who will loan me cameras when mine is being repaired!  And customer service people who do care when you call them with a problem.

I'm thankful for finding a good Christmas present for my brother, even if it did finally arrive after Christmas!

I'm thankful for our house.  That we have our own yard.  That we have more room.  That it's ours (we won't talk about the mortgage company!).

And finally, I'm thankful that we live in a place where if I don't like one store's policies I can go down the street to another store.  And I can support my local businesses!

There:  Now I feel a whole lot better!  Here's to working on the optimism side that I seem to be lacking... at least according to my husband!

Buyer Beware

I've had some pretty awful customer service experiences lately.  If it was one or two I think I'd just brush it aside, but I actually have a crazy list of things that has taken me quite a bit of time to follow up on.  I'm going to try not to be completely negative, but you tell me if you've had similar experiences, please?  I want to think I'm not crazy (let me live in my delusions, okay?).  And yes, be warned, this post will be extremely long so if you don't care?  Feel free to move on!

***

It dates from October starting with my medical insurance.  My policy was up for renewal with a huge increase in premium so I had to switch to another plan with less coverage.  Unfortunately they charged me for the old policy... on an automatic withdrawal program.  I caught it the first month and asked for a refund of the difference.  Since the check "would take 45 days (!!!) to clear" I just said, well, apply it to next month.  I thought that would do it, but no, the next month I was once again charged the full old premium amount!  This time I said no, I'm sorry, I will need a full refund of all the money you have overcharged me and not in 45 days!  They said it would be mailed the following week.  Two weeks later I still hadn't received it.  3 or 4 phone calls and many hours later I got my money back.

The very last person I spoke with actually seemed to be able to solve the problem and she has since called me (!!) to make sure that everything was straight with the billing and just generally let me know where we are in the process.  Apparently it takes months for them to switch people from one plan to another?  Crazy!  But I'm thankful that someone is helping me keep track of it!

I'm also curious as to know if I would have ever received a refund on that money since it was never applied to my new policy until I called... in December!  I wonder how much money people pay extra that they don't realize if they're not on top of their money accounts?

***

Next up, some discount membership sites.  I joined these because it looked like they might have things I was interested in anyway... and at good discounts why not?  Christmas was coming...

Totsy is "the private sale site for Moms" and having two small boys I was interested to see if they might have anything I needed.  I placed an order on October 31st for some Green Toys Inc. BPA-free and made-of-recycled-materials feeding stuff for Noah.  I also ordered a couple of cool wooden puzzles made by ImagiPlay.  My order did not arrive at my door until December 14th.  Granted, I did get a couple of emails along the way stating that they knew it was taking a long time and eventually they gave me (and I presume others) a $5 credit towards another order.  A long time for shipping, but I suppose I could understand.

However.  The wooden puzzles were so poorly made that they wouldn't stay together and one of them had a piece broken when I took it out of it's shrink wrap.  Perhaps this is why they were selling so cheaply on this site?  Because they have a no returns policy.  Not for defective merchandise, not for things broken, presumably in shipping.  Lame.  The only thing they will take back is shirts and pants.  NO accessories or anything that isn't clothing.  Buyer Beware for sure on this site.  Make sure you know exactly what you are buying or have the money to throw away.

***

The second discount site I signed up for was The Foundary (no, I'm not linking to these sites because I've had such poor experiences with them I wouldn't recommend them to anyone).  I found out later it's a subsidiary or partner of The Hayneedle.  Within a few days of signing up they had a sale on Kitchen Aid accessories, which almost never go on sale.  I hemmed and hawed and finally decided that since we had a balance in our paypal account that would cover it I would go ahead and order the ice cream maker attachment that I'd been wanting for awhile.

Well.  That was November 8th and I got I can't remember how many delay notices.  Finally a week before Christmas I emailed them to complain and ask about a possible credit and to see just how long it would take since they had already taken the money out of my paypal account... sort of.  The response I got was basically they had no idea what was going on and here was a $5 credit to my account.  This was only because I'd asked and this was a significantly larger purchase than the one I made at Totsy.

Funny thing, the attachment actually arrived on Christmas Eve (maybe since I'd mentioned it was a good thing this wasn't supposed to be a Christmas present?), but they've continued to access my paypal account placing and removing balance payments every week, up until the 12th of January.  I have to make a call to paypal to see about blocking their access to my account since the money is already deducted.

I actually received another delay notice from them after Christmas stating my item would be shipping on January 16th... so perhaps we'll see if I get another one here in the next few days!  What would I do with it?


I think I'm done typing for tonight... but tell me, would you ever buy from either of these sites again???

Monsanto Strikes Again

Oh, I'm so all fired up right now I don't even know if I can write a coherent post.

In case any of you haven't heard, here's a little background.  Monsanto is originally a chemical company (they make Round-Up) that now also produces most of the genetically engineered seeds for our food and rBGH (also known as rBST) the artificial bovine growth hormone.  Their business practices are horrific. (I highly recommend this link - this was my first introduction to them two years ago)

Today I've come across an article in the Huffington Post talking about ice cream.  How are the two related you may ask?  Well, ice cream is made with milk, no?

I already avoid milk and butter with rBGH, but it never even occurred to me that other dairy products are made with the same milk, duh!  Thankfully I usually buy Tillamook and Lucerne brands which state directly on the label that they do not use milk from cows treated with rBGH.

So what's the big deal about rBGH?  Well, first off it has been documented as being bad for the cow.  It increases the chances of mastitis (and from a nursing mother standpoint, that's incredibly painful) as well as the cow's overall chances of becoming lame.  I'm not sure why, I just know that this is one of the side effects.  So from an animal health/cruelty standpoint this is not good.

Now, from the human standpoint there is the basic stance of, why would we want to put unknown chemicals into our bodies?  Just to "see what happens"?  I don't know many people who would willing sign up for that.  But studies have also shown a correlation between a by product of rBGH that cows produce called IGF-1 and the chances of humans then developing breast, colon, and prostate cancer.  Cows produce double the amount of IGF-1 when injected with rBGH.  Even slight increases in IFG-1 in women showed up to 7 times the risk of developing breast cancer!

This rBGH chemical is banned in Canada, Australia, New Zealand, Japan, and the entire European Union.  Once again the US is behind the curve (or perhaps being lobbied?) in outlawing a chemical that is simply a profit producer at the expense of our collective health.

Do a simple google search on Monsanto and you will find plenty of sites out there simply bashing on Monsanto.  But dig a little deeper and you will also find things like I've linked above.  Plenty of sound reasons to be skeptical of anything Monsanto claims is for the "good" of humans or the earth.

Some days all I want to do is stick my head in the sand.  (Don't even get me started on the genetically engineered seeds!  Yes, there are benefits, but there are also some major risks!)  It seems like every time I turn around there is another thing to remember to avoid.  Some are easier to remember than others.  This is one that I'll definitely be remembering! 

Non-Toxic Kids has a great post this week on how you can contact the ice cream manufacturers that are still using milk laced with rBGH.

Let's stand up for healthy living!


Ice Creams to avoid currently:

Baskin-Robbins

Breyers - includes:

• Good Humor
• Klondike
• Popsicle

Dreyers - includes:

• Edy's
• Nestle
• Haagen Dazs

Thanks to Stephanie at Metropolitan Mama for getting me started on these links today!

Bubble Girl

Yes, I freely admit, this is what my friends called me when I was in high school. And for good reason I suppose, but I didn't care.

See, I grew up in a small town, without a TV, and pretty much didn't care about what was "popular", celebrities, styles, etc. I mostly still don't, although I do regret my exclusively t-shirt and jeans wardrobe back then...

But where am I going with all this?

Well, lately the popular thing seems to be getting all riled up about politics. And if you've read my blog for any length of time you'll know that I don't usually talk about controversial or political things. But basically I'm just sick of it all.

I'm sick of the polarization.

I'm sick of the caricaturing of those we don't agree with.

I'm sick of the media hype and the fear-mongering.

Can't we all just get along like rational civilized human beings???

And here's where my Bubble Girl mentality kicks in...

I'm all for being educated on the issues. Read lots of different sources, pay attention to the news, talk to your friends, talk to your legislators, and vote.

However, at some point it seems there is not a whole lot I, as an individual, can do. And at that point I'd rather not hear anything more about it. I'd like to stick my head in the sand like an ostrich.

I want to live in my house with my family, enjoy them, nature, life, and not be constantly bombarded by all the craziness!

I do believe strongly in a few issues and I make my opinions known to my representatives, but I don't go around spouting them all the time. I'm beginning to think we can make more of a difference in our sphere of influence than on the national scene. (Of course if you are well known and have an audience, you may have more influence than I. But I don't aspire to that sort of thing.)

Change the world through how you live. Live simply. Don't rely on your stuff or your circumstances to make you happy. Cherish the moments and people around you.

I'm thinking of how Shaun Groves has downsized his life and made his priority about saving children. Right now he's in El Salvador with Compassion to raise awareness of what we can do in the life of just one child. But here at home, he's moved into a smaller house, making do with less stuff.

Please don't get me wrong. I'm not idolizing him. I just think that some of the things he aspires to do in his life are pretty worthwhile. I'm still working on it.

In conclusion, comma, what I think I'm trying to say is this:

Be a friend.

Be a person who looks at others as just like you. Treat them like you would like to be treated.

Live in the now and don't worry as much about the future.

And if you must, be invested in politics, but not so much that you forget that "they" are people too!



Have a blessed weekend! and let me go back to my bubble, pretty please?

Wordless Wednesday: Cutest Boy Ever

This picture is from a couple weeks ago, but with our computer issues I didn't even put any pictures on it lately. Now I have a months worth of pictures to go through... wish me luck... on a computer that they couldn't find anything wrong with that is still crashing on me. Joy.

Technology and other things

We got this fancy new computer a couple months ago. It was supposed to help me with my picture editing, allow me the freedom to get things done in a timely manner. (instead of taking an hour to edit one picture because my old laptop was so slow)

For whatever reason on Thursday our new computer decided it didn't like us anymore. It randomly crashed and has repeatedly crashed since then. We can't figure out why. We were doing the same things we'd been doing since we got it.

Brian has been working on it since then and as far as we can tell he's no closer to figuring out what's going on. To our knowledge we have no viruses or spy-ware. All scans show up clean and the memory and disk checks find nothing. He even re-installed Vista (don't laugh, we know that must have something to do with it - stupid unstable OS) and still it crashes.

It seems to somehow be tied to our internet usage as Firefox has stopped working all together and it only crashes when we are online. But we don't know what's making it crash.

If nothing resolves itself soon Brian will get to take it with him to the computer shop in Seattle where we bought it when he goes off to his summer job next week.

Needless to say, I probably won't be online much this week or next. I'm lucky that the internet works in safe mode... and of course I could break out my old laptop if I wanted to wait half an hour for it to boot up and load the internet...

Any and all suggestions are welcome!

Happy 4th of July... and I won't even go into have crazy convoluted and un-church-like our church felt this morning...

Technology Sucks

So, this weekend I noticed my header for this blog was randomly missing. I went hunting and discovered that for some reason my hosting service *cough*imageshack*cough* didn't have the picture anymore. Weird. (and yes, it's back, I didn't do anything and I have no idea why!)

But I decided that meant it was time to swap out some pictures and put up a new one.

So I went to find the CD's that have all my pictures on them. I was looking for one in particular and thought it was in March of last year. Well, that CD would not load on this new computer. I took it out and behold, it was horribly scratched. I have no idea how it got that way as it was in a stack with all the other burned CD's and none of them are scratched, nor do I hardly ever move them or even touch them!

I tried the scratch repair kit with no luck. I tried to "un-delete" on my laptop in hopes they were still around.

Finally today I called the computer repair guy that fixed my laptop last year and he lent me his Disc Doctor. It seemed to make the scratches less noticeable and we have managed to get a few of the pictures off, one at a time...

However, then when I started loading some other disks onto this new computer they would get halfway and get stuck. We tried a few things to make it easier on the computer, but no luck.

Now I have a feeling that something is wrong with our DVD drive and I'm actually scared that it is damaging the discs that we put in even though it should only be reading them.

This computer is still under warranty, but it's in Seattle. Thankfully we are already making a trip there in a week and a half, so here's hoping that it's the DVD drive, they will replace it, and we'll be good to go.

In the meantime I'll just be over here hyperventilating... because the pictures on that CD? Were of Cory's 1st birthday.

Technology sucks.

Rocking Chair Torture

Have you ever tried to buy a rocking chair? Not the new glider rockers that are everywhere, but a real wood rocking chair?

We looked and looked for one when I was pregnant with Cory. Finally Brian found a kit that we could order online from Shaker Workshops. Well, we could have bought the finished chair, but that was twice as expensive. As it is we paid $375 for the kit.

Brian and my dad spent many hours sanding, waxing, and oiling this chair. I even have some funny pictures of Brian and Allison's then boyfriend, Joel, weaving the seat cover just a few weeks after Cory was born.

Finally it was finished... and I hated it. It is the worst rocking chair ever. I tried to be excited, but it's just not a nice chair. The back slats are so far apart I had to make a cushion for it. The arms are too wide and too high. It was labeled as the perfect chair for nursing mothers. NOT!

But the worst thing about it? It doesn't rock.

We could have bought a regular chair if that was what we wanted! It takes more leg motion to rock this chair than it does an overstuffed recliner!

I eventually emailed the company and told them how disappointed I was... No response. Their "satisfaction guarantee" says that you can return anything within 30 days for a full refund if it's in the original condition. I'd say that would have been kind of hard to do with a kit rocking chair.


What precipitated me writing this post almost 2 years later?

Well, today I went to Costco with my parents and found the perfect rocking chair! Made by Montana Woodworks it's on sale for $350 and we wouldn't even have to put it together!!! It's beautiful, comfortable, and best of all??? It rocks!!!

So, the lame Shaker chair is going on Craigslist ASAP and if it sells I'm going back to Costco to buy this one! Wish me luck!

CPSIA Issue

Hello friends,

You know I try to avoid politics at all costs on this blog, but I've run across something I just can't keep quiet about anymore.

I wonder how many of you have heard about the CPSIA Act of 2008? It stands for the Consumer Product Safety Improvement Act.

First off let me say, I'm all for keeping our products safe... But this piece of legislation has created a lot more problems than it will solve.

In a nutshell it requires that all products (toys, clothing, bedding, dishes, etc) intended for use by children under the age of 12 be tested for lead and pthalates and labeled accordingly.

On the surface this looks like a good idea. It would save us from all the recall scares from toys made in China and such. We could know that we weren't inadvertently poisoning our children when we give them a plastic gummy toy to chew on.

But here's the rub. This applies to all products no matter where they were made if they are for sale in the US. So... you want to make some carved wooden toys and sell them on Etsy or Ebay or even out of your home? You have to test them. To the tune of up to $4,000 per item. Me thinks that might just put a few small businesses out of business entirely! Here's a link to the Handmade Toy Alliance where they explain it much better than I can.
Here's an excerpt from that example:

The CPSIA simply forgot to exclude the class of children's goods that have earned and kept the public's trust: Toys, clothes, and accessories made in the US, Canada, and Europe. The result, unless the law is modified, is that handmade children's products will no longer be legal in the US.

If this law had been applied to the food industry, every farmers market in the country would be forced to close while Kraft and Dole prospered. (because they can afford the testing fees based on the bulk that they sell - my explanation)

It also applies to all items for resale after February 10, 2009. Think about your local resale clothing shop? They either have to test all their clothing or throw it away. They can't sell it, they can't even give it away. It's considered contraband. (Wonder how fast our landfills are going to be filled with perfectly good clothes?) Ebay and Amazon Marketplace will also be enforcing this. You won't be able to sell anything used either.

What can we do?

Let's write our congressmen and senators and ask them to please amend this piece of legislation!

Tests are already done by materials makers (to comply with current regulations) so much of this testing is redundant in the US. We need an exemption for items made in the US of US materials.
Conversely the Handmade Toy Alliance is proposing that the CSPC provide free testing for small businesses.

If you want to be able to buy local, handmade, or even used goods for children after February 10th we need to take action on this!

Write to your senators and congressmen, even the CSPC - try modifying the letter found here. All links will open in a new tab.

And thanks for caring!

Oh Cory Boy

I'm so glad you're cute... because today you have not been so cute!

But we are not going to dwell on that tonight. We are going to dwell on the cuteness that is Cory!

Exhibit A: Cory finds the animal crackers we have just bought at the store.


Exhibit B: Cory finds that the closet has been left open, brings out one of Daddy's shoes, and tries to step into it. I help him and then take a picture!


Exhibit C: Cory makes a new friend of my parents puppy, Cayenne. Mom gave him bits of puppy chow and he was feeding the puppy right out of his hand. Darn cute!


Exhibit D: Cory goes swimming and splashes the heck out of everyone! My brother's girlfriend's grandpa (follow that?) has a pool and he's welcomed us to come use it whenever we want. (Sweet!)


Exhibit E: Cory finds the drum that Auntie Allison brought us from Africa before he was born. I have been thinking for the last couple months that we need to get him a drum... totally forgetting that we already had a real one!



Oh and by the way?

Air France?

SUCKS!

Today I went to book our plane tickets to Saudi Arabia next March using frequent flier miles. A round trip ticket on any of the major airlines is running around $1,800 (including on Air France). So I booked through Northwest and the trip includes one leg each on Northwest, KLM, and Air France. Then I had to call in to add Cory to the itinerary, fully expecting to pay $300 - $400 in taxes for him even though he would be sitting on our laps.

After 45 minutes on hold (no, I'm not kidding, that's how long it took them to figure this out) they quoted me $1400 for him. ON MY LAP. And if I wanted to buy him his own ticket/seat on our same itinerary?

Almost $7,000!!!

The reason for this? On our return flight the only option with miles was to go to Amsterdam, back to Paris, and then home on Air France. That little Air France option was going to cost us $700 alone for Cory. All the other sections combined were $600. LAME!

I called back later and got a different quote of $900 for the whole flight - and checked to see if there were any other options for our tickets that would avoid AF (of course not). The attendant told me that AF doesn't give infant discounts even if they're in the lap and because we have that one segment with them... we are basically screwed.

So nice of Air France to make us pay half of a full fare when we don't even get a seat or a baggage allowance for him. I only wish I could take my business elsewhere...